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Just say yes!

Why are we so scared to say YES!?!

The other day I was chatting with a girlfriend of mine, who says she always says no to dates.  And that got me thinking.


How often a day do we say “no?”

Sure, there are appropriate times to say no. You do not want to be a push-over.  But there is a difference to saying “no” because it is the right thing to do and saying “no” because you are just too scared to say “yes.”

And you may not even realize that you are fearful or intentionally preventing yourself from accepting an opportunity.

As an actress, I took Committed Impulse with Josh Pais, a class and teacher that I would like to revisit soon. Josh Pais changed my life as an actress, creative, and person–by teaching me the power of saying “yes.”

Not saying “yes” and agreeing to do asinine things. That’s not helpful either, y’all! But saying “yes” to the present moment, “yes” to your feelings, “yes” instead of “no” when you get scared or uncomfortable. And, speaking from experience, I actually kind of suck at it.  I need to get better at embracing the “yes” myself.”

Josh tells you to “party with your fear.” To “see what is in front of you,” “breathe,” and find the present moment. Or, as he tweeted recently “Be here now.Be someplace else later.Is that so complicated?”

So the next time you want to say  “no.”  Come back to the present. Are you saying no to the date, to the opportunity, to you because you really CAN’T do it? Or is fear holding you back?

I randomly ended up saying yes and having quite an excellent and truly just friends coffee spur of the moment with an ex-boyfriend. (We literally were in the same coffee shop at the exact same time.) And my brain and my fear wanted to say “no.” To run away. To take the easy way out.  Instead, I recognized my reluctance as fear, and I said “yes.” I had coffee with him.  And it was actually good and taught me the importance of friendship. (And made me realize how tightly wound I can be–oh my Lordy I need to relax sometimes!)

So the next time you want to say “no” because you’re uncomfortable, what happens if you say “yes?”

And I re-made my left-over Hake fish into a delectable dinner afterward, as well. By popular demand, allow me to say “yes” and present you with the recipe! πŸ™‚

Polenta, Tomato-Basil Sauce, and Parmesan Panko White Fish
Serves 2.


  • Polenta tube (4-8 rounds, depending on thickness) Approximately 2-4 per person.
  • Cherry tomato sauce, 1 cup (low sodium or home-made)
  • Fresh Spinach, 1-2 cups
  • Fresh basil, 1/2 cup, cut into strips
  • Parmesan Cheese
  • Left-over Parmesan Panko White Fish

For Parmesan Panko White Fish:
(Adapted from Mollie Katzen’s Get Cooking)
Two  fish fillets. (I used Hake from Whole Foods) Washed, dried, and sliced into 4 oz pieces.
1. Heat skillet to medium, while skillet is heating break one egg in a pie dish.  In a separate plate combine 1/2 cup panko, 1/4 cup grated parmesan, dash of salt, and dash of pepper.
2. Add 1 tablespoon (approximately) olive oil and 1 tablespoon butter to skillet. Coat pan thoroughly.
3. Dip fillets individually into egg, then into panko-parmesan mixture. Place into skillet.
4. Cook each fish for 2-3 minutes on each side, or until cooked through.  To serve, you may wish to squeeze fresh lemon juice on top.

For Italian Polenta with White Fish: (utilizing left-over white fish)

1.  Heat one cup of tomato sauce in a small dish.  Bring to simmer.  Once tomato sauce is hot, add spinach and basil. Stir constantly. Bring back to a simmer.  Once fully heated leave on “low” until polenta and fish are hot.
2. Turn oven on to broil. Coat baking sheet with olive oil spray.  Place polenta rounds on sheet.  Broil polenta for approximately 5-8 minutes, or until fully heating.
3. While polenta is broiling, reheat fish in a pan coated with oil spray on the stove on medium-low heat until hot.
4. Place polenta rounds on plate 2-4 per person, depending on thickness.  Top with 1/4-1/2 cup of tomato sauce with spinach and basil.  Place heated fish on top of polenta and sauce mixture.  Sprinkle parmesan cheese on top to taste.

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