Yoga Faux Pas
I thought by now, yoga etiquette was generally universally KNOWN and accepted.
Just a “DUH” thing, right?
Apparently our local yogis do not yet obey the rules of courtesy. And it’s a scary sight! (Literally.)
Things to keep in mind before heading to your yoga class. (Please, please, please, tell your friends.)
- If your pants or old or getting small, DO NOT WEAR THEM!!! I had a bad case of “see-thru-yoga-pant-itis” yesterday. I.e. I got to see a girl’s entire bottom ahead of me–so see through I could see her entire bottom (no panties.) Not a pretty site!!! Just because leggings are stretchy, doesn’t mean they can fit everyone. If you gain weight or they are getting old–DO NOT WEAR THEM. Repeat! DO NOT WEAR THEM. If you have doubts, ask a friend to look at your butt. Because, trust me, no one wants to/it is impossible to do yoga staring at your butt crack the entire time. ICK ICK ICK!
- If you have to go to the bathroom and the bathroom is connected to the studio’s yoga room, do it BEFORE savasana/final relaxation. We can hear you pee! That is definitely not relaxing. And you’d probably not want us to hear you pee. So do it before or wait the 10 minutes and go after class. Or if it is an EMERGENCY turn the sink on when you go to the bathroom. But we’re not four years old, you should be able to plan better than that!
- Please wear deodorant. I don’t care how hippie you are. Wear deodorant!
- Do not put your mat touching the person’s mat in front of you. That is rude. And impractical!
- Do not stink–save the heavy perfume for another day. I’m trying to relax and breathe deeply, not asphyxiate from your cheap, trashy perfume.
- WIPE YOUR SWEAT! Seriously. WIPE YOUR SWEAT. Do not let it puddle in front of your mat and fling it on your neighbor when you raise your arms. Because that’s nasty. I don’t want to wear your sweat. And remember that I am next to you. If your sweat is building a puddle that will reach my mat–wipe it up. Or better yet–don’t let yourself have puddles. Wipe your face and arms before you get to that level. Pretty please?
- Turn the dang cell phone off and leave your purse/phone/keys/shoes/make-up/book/crazy crap you brought with you–where you are supposed to–in the locker room, cubby, against the wall, whatever the studio’s protocol is. Do not pile it around your mat and build it up so that it’s in the way of your neighbor’s mat when you practice. And for heaven’s sake, turn the iphone off.
- Don’t talk all through class. I’ve harped on this before in “Namaste Beeyatch!” but don’t be those rude girls.
- Do not walk on other people’s mats. That’s rude. And I don’t want your feet going where my face is about to be. I don’t know you.
- Ask politely to borrow a neighbor’s prop or to share a prop. Don’t steal their props at the beginning of class because you are too lazy to grab your own. Or don’t take it mid-class without asking because you suddenly want a block. Your neighbor probably wanted that block too, that’s why they got it at the start of class! Ask first. And if you borrow a strap for a pose–return it to your neighbor after. Or just walk over and grab your own to be safe.
- Put your stuff back politely at the end of class. Say thank you. Leave politely and respectfully. Not the time to start yelling. And don’t hang around forever. The teacher eventually wants to go home, there may be a class afterwards, or the studio workers need to lock-up. Remember that yoga time is for everyone–not just you.
And most importantly…..