How to Open a Stuck Jar Lid
How do you open a stuck jar lid?
This is a serious question. I live alone. I bought hearts of palm from Trader Joe’s and was RIDICULOUSLY excited to put them on my salad. Only….
I can’t open the jar.
I know, I know, First World Problem. I can’t open my fancy jar of hearts of palm from snazzy Trader Joe’s.
But… I really want my hearts of palm!
|The evil jar of Hearts of Palm. Dear Lid, WHY WON’T YOU COME OFF!?!?!?!?!?|
I cannot open the jar. I tried every trick in the book. I googled new ways to “supposedly” open a jar. (Did you know how many links, videos, and websites on google are related to this? Scary!)
No mater how hard I tried, the offending lid WOULD NOT BUDGE.
It’s one of those times, I hate to say it, when if you live alone, you are doomed. DOOMED!
I need a man.
A man could open the jar, I know it. That’s one of their great purposes in life. And it’s not my fault that my hands are so much smaller than a guy’s hands! Or that I have less upper body strength. No matter how much I practice my plank pose and chaturanga dandasana.
Only, I’m pretty sure every guy friend I know would mock me to no end if I called them to open a jar of hearts of palm. And most of them don’t live very close to me.
I thought about going to the courtyard to see if there was anyone in my building who could open my jar. But then I thought, wow they’d think I’m a crazy person. And I already did that once before–when I got locked out of my bathroom (dire circumstances, don’t even ask how it happened), and I’m still teased about that by the retirees in my bedroom. I didn’t think I needed to add “weakling” to the mockery, too.
So I’m stuck. With a jar. That won’t open. And I’ve tried. And I’m pretty sure all that yoga makes me stronger than the average gal. But still. No hearts of palm for me.
What do you do if you can’t get a lid open??
For now, the jar sits on a shelf in my cabinet. Uneaten. Untasted. Unloved. Lid firmly attached. Alas!
Major sad face for me. Oh hearts of palm, some day I will get you open. And when that day comes, it will be the most satisfying day ever!!!
On the plus side, I treated myself to a Trader Joe pan au chocolate aka chocolate croissant this am! Like the mini plain croissants from Mr. Joe’s (see Croissants and California), these chocolate filled ones really get big overnight. You have to cook them for longer (mine took exactly 21 minutes) and let them cool for slightly longer (melted chocolate will burn your tongue otherwise, trust me. It burns, oh, it BURNS! They tell you to wait for a reason…Read the directions!)
The chocolate croissants are definitely a hit! Added bonus: they are definitely far FAR superior to the supposed “chocolate croissants” they serve at my local French pastry shop Cassis. (I usually like Cassis, but they have the worst chocolate croissants in the history of chocolate croissants. They aren’t even shaped in a square and contain itty bitty mini chocolate chips on the top. They look like what you would get at 7-11, not at a French patisserie. YUCK!)
Verdict: I will make these again any time–and would even serve them to company. And plus side? Unlike plain croissants, you don’t serve chocolate croissants with jam. No need to try and open another jar!
|Trader Joe’s pain au chocolat–fresh from the oven!|