Lora Hogan > Uncategorized  > On Forgiveness

On Forgiveness


We often talk about forgiving others, which is vital and necessary for happiness and success.

But while we spend so much time focusing on forgiving others, we often overlook the person that needs to be forgiven the most…Me, Myself, I.


The hardest person to forgive is often YOU.

But you can never achieve true abundance and joy without loving yourself and embracing ALL of you.

That means forgiving yourself.

Sometimes we screw up. Sometimes we blame ourselves for incidents. Sometimes we aren’t very loving. I hated my body for years and would wake up every morning telling myself awful things such as “you’re fat” or “you don’t deserve xzy” and horrid horrid horrid ways of blaming myself for things that, in reality were either non-existant or out of my control.

And then even after making peace with my body and SEEMINGLY being happy with everything in my life. I forgave everyone who caused past hurts. I let go (I thought) of all the past blame, guilt, you name it for my life.

But I never ever took the time to really, truthfully, HONESTLY forgive me.

We are not perfect. We make mistakes. But you need to know that, whatever has happened in your life, whatever things didn’t go the way you wanted them to, YOU WERE DOING THE BEST YOU COULD DO IN THE MOMENT, GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCES. That is all that we can do. We can only offer our best in every moment with the feelings and knowledge that we have at that time and place. You COULD NOT do better. You COULD NOT have acted different. You acted the way you did and that was the way it was mean to unfold. You did the best that you could given the circumstances.

So maybe something didn’t go your way. Maybe you accidentally caused hurt to another. Or hurt to yourself. But you cannot let those moments, that past prevent you from living your future. You have to let it go.

And the only way to let go to really let in the real you is by making total and complete peace with yourself. Go easy on yourself. Forgive yourself.

Remember that everything is unfolding exactly as it is meant to and that you are exactly where you are meant to be. Everything is happening FOR you for YOUR BENEFIT and you need to trust exactly where you’ve ended up.  Take time to remember the way you felt in a negative situation, let yourself feel the pain and the strife. And then let it go. Make forgiveness with Y-O-U. Because forgiving others is well and good, but you can’t truly forgive and you can’t truly let go and welcome in the life you are meant to lead, without loving and forgiving yourself.

Whatever happened, happened. You can’t go back and change it. You shouldn’t want to, even if you could. You did the best that you could do, given the circumstances. You did exactly what you were meant to do, given the circumstances. If you caused harm to others, recognize that, feel that, ask for forgiveness from them, but remember the true forgiveness lies with you. Forgive yourself. Now that you know better, you will DO better. But you didn’t know better than. It’s okay. Let it go. Let yourself love yourself completely and unbashadely.

It’s okay.

You’re not perfect.

No one is perfect.

But you are on the path you are meant to be on. Everything that has happened has lead you to this moment, and the next, and the moment after that. But in order to welcome in the life you deserve and are meant to lead, you must make peace with your past.

Forgive yourself for past wrongs, past unpleasant feelings or behaviors. They are in the past. You did the best you could. Now do the best you can and make peace with you. Love you completely, flaws and all. Trust that you are exactly who you are meant to be. And forgive.

And then let it all go.

Welcome in the future.

With love.

Because you deserve it. You are worthy of great things! Welcome them, accept them, and set out to lead the amazing life you are meant to lead. With a heart that is capable of embracing ALL the good things coming your way. With a heart that loves you first and foremost. And with that love of self you can then go out and lead the live you are meant to live. You can truly be love, share love, and receive love. You can begin to change the world through love. Just by being 100% you.

What do you say?




  • GiGi Eats

    June 23, 2015 at 4:08 pm

    I call this a flaw of mine, but I do not hold grudges. I forgive extremely easily because life is WAY TOO SHORT to continue to be angry at someone. What’s the point?

  • Jenna

    June 24, 2015 at 7:37 am

    Such a true and important message. I have a lot of trouble with forgiving myself and moving on. Even if it’s something that is completely out of my hands, I will hold on and not let it go for a long time. I have to constantly remind myself that without our flaws and mistakes we would never improve or learn! I’m definitely not perfect and that’s what makes me great!