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Lora Hogan > Uncategorized  > Why I’ve been so quiet

Why I’ve been so quiet

WEBApril2015LoraHogan-14

I’ve been struggling with what to say.

Why?

Because I have a confession to make:

I’ve been hurt.

I haven’t been able to run for the last month.

Why? Absolutely no reason. I just woke up one morning, twisted and then my scoliosis went all out of alignment and BOY DID IT HURT.

I’ve been struggling with trying to repair my body, as well as the struggles for my ego. When you can’t run, when you can’t do some of your favorite yoga postures, when you can’t move the way you are used to moving…it is beyond difficult.

I didn’t know what to say. We are entering the height of race season, my favorite time of year, and I can’t even go two miles. I’ve cried. I’ve hit pillows. I’ve been emotionally a wreck.

And then I realized, I am just being told to slow down. There will be more races. There will be other long runs. I have so much time to do them all.

So I am using this time to go within. To slow down. Try and permanently repair my back so that, going forward, I can run further and faster without pain.

But it means I have to be honest with you all. I’ve been hurting. And that is not an easy thing to share.

But now that I have, I think I will begin to heal. Because I do believe everything is happening FOR you and not TO you. And now that I’ve been forced to slow down, to go within, to pause from my favorite activities. I am better able to appreciate all that they offer. I have more love for running, for yoga, for Bar Method, for walking, for dancing–heck even for sitting.

And I’ve found out what lives inside when I *don’t* run. I’ve been saying hello to someone I needed to spend time with most of all….myself.

Meditating, slow yoga, reading, journaling, etc. That’s where I’ve been lately. Baking, cooking, slow walks, singing, chanting, breathing.

I’ve been within. And it will make me all the stronger when my back is healed and I can extend my fullest version of me out into the world.

So thank you scoliosis. Although I am so sad I can’t do some of my favorite activities right now, I am grateful for the back pain for allowing me to reconnect to one of the most important things in life–myself.

Namaste,

Lora

Comments:

  • Lynda@fitnessmomwinecountry

    October 4, 2015 at 12:17 pm

    Lora, re-connecting with our selves via mind and body are so important. I have been finding myself doing somewhat the similar {minus an injury} just having my running taking a back seat the past two {plus} weeks knowing I have my next half marathon approaching.
    I have had guilt surround me for not putting in the efforts I know I can. Here’s to slowing down and healing whatever it is we need to heal within ourselves and to good health and amazing runs in the near future. xoxo

  • Chrissy @ Snacking in Sneakers

    October 4, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    I’m right there with you. Sprained my foot and then because of the way I walked on it, ended up with plantar fasciitis, plus am having knee issues. I feel like a hot mess and it’s SO frustrating when your body doesn’t work the way you want it to. I love your perspective in this post though and am going to try to take some tidbits of this to implement myself.

  • Amanda

    October 4, 2015 at 8:49 pm

    I hope you feel better soon! You have such a wonderful perspective. We need to listen to our bodies, and sometimes that means to slow down.

  • Rachel @ RachelMcMichael.com

    October 5, 2015 at 7:38 am

    What a great perspective. “And then I realized, I am just being told to slow down. There will be more races….”

  • Jenna

    October 5, 2015 at 12:36 pm

    I’m sorry to hear about your injury but love your positive perspective. It makes all the difference when you can appreciate the time you have to look within. Wishing you a fast recovery!

  • Meghan R

    October 5, 2015 at 1:10 pm

    Sorry that you aren’t doing well, but you are giving your body the break it needs. You will be back to it soon enough!

  • Eric

    October 5, 2015 at 1:41 pm

    We, your friends, think the world of you no matter what. Cheers, e

  • Fiona @ Get Fit Fiona

    October 5, 2015 at 6:22 pm

    I really admire your positivity in the midst of an injury.

  • Michelle @ Running with Attitude

    October 5, 2015 at 7:25 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear about your injury – I know how frustrating it can be. I haven’t run in 3 weeks and am headed to surgery tomorrow. Wishing you a speedy recovery!

  • Christy

    October 5, 2015 at 7:35 pm

    I’m on the sidelines with you! Thanks for the inspiration. Maybe we can have an injured get together soon and you can share some of your wisdom! It’s a tough road.

  • diane

    October 6, 2015 at 9:04 pm

    Oh man Lora, I am sorry to hear that you are hurting πŸ™ I am sort of dealing with something like that right now. I even find myself getting jealous when my husband and oldest daughter talk about their long runs and I feel so frustrated with what I have only been able to manage lately. I know that when the time has passed (I swear that’s the only thing that really fixes these injuries) things will be great again. I didn’t mean to talk about myself here but wanted you to know that you are NOT alone! I ordered a Yoga For Runners DVD that I did today and I was pissed that it didn’t immediately fix me! Good luck to you and I am glad you are finding the good in what started off to feel like a bad situation. Happy Healing Friend!

  • Tia

    October 7, 2015 at 4:56 pm

    Lora. although I know it sucks to miss out on the races, I am glad that you are using the time wisely. Our bodies sometimes know better than we do and will force us to be still and rest. I wish you a speedy recovery and good health in the near future.

  • Cathy

    October 13, 2015 at 6:02 pm

    Lora, I hope you feel much better very soon. I have had back issues in the past and found the book “Healing Back Pain Naturally: The Mind-Body Program Proven to Work” by Art Brownstein, plus Rodney Yee’s Back Care Yoga DVD, to be very helpful. Oh, and I did Rock and Roll Brooklyn this weekend and believe me, you didn’t miss out on a thing…it was the most poorly organized race I’ve ever done, won’t go into details since I don’t like to complain, you can read the comments on the FB page to get an idea of the many areas that fell short. Hopefully they will learn from this inaugural run and next year will be much much better, and you’ll be there!!!